I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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