apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize