'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
