I need help removing her.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
