look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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