She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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