Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
you're hired as official boob wrangler
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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