Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
