You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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