Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
