Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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