Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
