i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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