I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
