My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
My liver just had a heart attack.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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