A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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