he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Randomize
