Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
