They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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