two words: eviction party
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Someone came in the potted fern
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
