she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
