she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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