I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
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