All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
