What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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