oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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