Non-Jews are for practice
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Randomize
