I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
