You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
