o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
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