Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
