I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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