just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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