ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
