The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
is wine microwaveable?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
