I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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