He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
