I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
