By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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