Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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