I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
