Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
