I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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