Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
