just tell him i said nine months
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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