Ketchup is God's man juice
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
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