I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
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