Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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