would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
