Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
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