Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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